The_Shoemaker_Update's Xanga

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Sun, 09 Nov 2008 23:52:17 GMT

Dear Friends,

Tomorrow will be one year from the day Mom died. I took some time the other day and read over the Xanga posts from that time. So many memories flood to my mind with each of those posts last year. The overwhelming theme in all those posts was God's abundant grace daily being poured out on us.

I must confess I have had a hard time coping the last few months with losing Mom. God's grace doesn't change, but I have not felt it as near and real as it seemed to be last year. There have been times in these months that I've questioned God. I have even been angry at Him. In times of frustration, I've asked Him how this has "worked out for our good." How has losing Mom been a good thing for us? A hardness built up and it was getting more and more difficult to praise Him on Sunday mornings. How could I sing of God's goodness when I had so many doubts that He even cared. Where is His grace now? What about now?

It's a dangerous line to be near when you start to question God's fairness and goodness. If you don't believe that God is good, then what hope is there in this life? Satan is so skillful at shooting darts of doubting thoughts into our minds and disguising it as "our true feelings coming out". Satan wants us to listen to ourselves and feel that we have a right to all our feelings, regardless of however negative or ugly they may be.

Mom's death has shaken me and Satan has used it to spiritually shake me away from the grace God was freely offering me. God's grace had not changed; I had. I have asked for God's forgiveness and through His mercy (and help from my godly husband) I daily ask for His strength to protect me not only against the devil, but against my own human weakness.

It's still incredibly hard. I often pray that God would erase some of the memories and mental images of what we were going through at this time a year ago. At times, those pictures of Mom in her last days flash to mind as though I was being hit in the head with them. I have to stop, take a breath and thank God that Mom is in heaven now.

Despite my times of doubting and ungratefulness over these past few months, God has been good and blessed me with gifts of comfort to ease my pain of missing Mom. He has given me several dreams where I can be with her and wrap my arms around her again and tell her how much I love her. I can talk and cry with her and tell her everything about how hard it's been without her. She never says anything, she only smiles and listens understandingly. In each dream, her peaceful silence instantly assures me that no matter what happens, or whatever my concerns may be- it's going to be okay in the end. God will take care of it.

God took care of her through the end and He'll do the same for me. I pray that God would give me some of the strength that she had. I pray that each of you will lean on God and trust Him despite your circumstances, or when you think what's best for you is different than what God has laid out for you. Do you believe that God is in control of everything? Do you believe He is good? If so, what else is necessary for total and complete peace and contentedness in your life? Stop leaning on your own understandings...my thoughts have been there, and there is nothing but darkness and sheer hopelessness in a life without a good and loving God.

Hope this Thanksgiving season finds you learning to trust God with everything!

~Kari

Monday, February 11, 2008

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 15:33:25 GMT

Yesterday was Gail's birthday and we just received a puppy through the generosity of one of our students and are presently up through the night tending him as if he were a new baby. He’s a lot of fun…and a lot of work! It is said that the only animal that will respond to mankind without a reward is a dog. Man’s best friend, the dog, needs only a pat on the head to be happy and obedient. While that is a reward in itself, food, and/or negative reinforcement are not necessary to train a dog. All it takes is praise, a pleasant tone of voice, and a pat on the head.

When Gail was in her last days with us and unable to move very much at all, I would come home from work and bend over her bed and hold her to myself. I would take her arm and place it over my back so she could hug me back. For the past few years she and I would often say to one another, “You’re doing so good in your life.” As I would hug her in this way I would say to her, “You’re doing so good.” I meant that she was being a great example of faith and patience as she suffered through her trial.

It was about three days before she went to be with the Lord and on this day particular day when I hugged her the kids were standing around and they said to her, “Mom, tell Dad that he’s doing so good.” As they kept coaching her she mustered the words, “You’re going to do so good.” At the same time she patted me on the back with what strength she had left. Gail was saying to me that after her departure she had confidence that I would continue, with God’s help, to be good for the family. She was assuring me and the kids that I would not fail them, and that all of us would be just fine. I cannot express how much that meant to me, and how it will continue to mean to me! I will go on in the encouragement of those words for many years. I rest satisfied that our thirty years together were filled mutual “pats on the back,” but this last one is a healing balm. All I’ve ever wanted was a pat on the back.

Is it true that our greatest desire; our deepest need, is a “pat on the head”? Whether from a parent or an employer or an admired friend, nothing makes us perk up and wag our tail more than the acceptance and praise of another. When a parent praises a child he or she is saying to that young one, “You are doing so good in your life. I accept you and am pleased with you. I am, at this moment, at rest with you. I love you.”

However wonderful approval is from another person, there is an even greater commendation—that of a holy God. The most wonderful words one will ever hear are to come from the Lord Jesus Christ at the end of life and while standing at the Judgment, “Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your Master.” And, “Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.” (Matthew 25).

It should be solemnly stated that only a few hear these comforting words. The others must hear, “Depart from Me, you accursed into the everlasting fire…” What’s the difference, and how can you be assured that the Savior will welcome you at the end of your life? Jesus is the difference. He offered Himself on the cross as the only way to God. The Father said of Jesus, “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.” When you surrender yourself to Him and believe that what He accomplished in His death for you, then you are forgiven for your sins and you are also pleasing to God. You become your Father’s child and are safe with Jesus in heaven. You have most certainly passed from death to life and will be welcomed into the kingdom. “Well done, good and faithful slave,” is the best pat on the back you will ever receive!

Thank you for your friendship and for walking through this valley with us.

Woody

Saturday, January 05, 2008

Sat, 05 Jan 2008 02:23:12 GMT

"The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord. Through all this Job did not sin nor did he blame God." Job 1:21b-22

    Thank you all for your continued prayer for our family over these weeks. We are still receiving cards and letters in the mail everyday which minister to us so much!

    Sometimes, when I think about Mom and all we/she went through last year, it seems so surreal and as though it didn't happen. We say to each other quite often: "I still can't believe it". I (and others of us) often have dreams that Mom is still with us and is healthy and whole. It seems that almost everyday there is something new to grieve over, but God is comforting each of us all along the way. Over these last few weeks (with God's grace) I think we have been doing well overall, just occasionally something will come to mind that will bring some tears here and there. We have so many wonderful memories of Mom and we want to dwell on those and on everything she taught us. I'm so thankful for everything she was and the powerful legacy she left behind!

    Joy and I will be starting work at a nearby hospital on Tuesday, January 8th. We are both looking forward to getting back to work as nurses as we have been out of nursing for over a year and a half now. The hospital is only a short drive away and has positions available which seem to be a perfect fit for our schedule. God is providing and it's so encouraging to watch as He is working out many of the details to be a job that is exactly what we need.

    Scott and Will are getting back into the routine of school again. They have some catching up to do after taking several weeks off last year, but I'm sure they won't have any trouble. Kate has been doing the majority of helping them with school and Joy and I teach a few of their subjects as well. It helps to have all three of us girls helping out with their school and so far it has been working out well.

    Dad and Jonathan have been working full-time doing finish carpentry and have enjoyed working with their hands as well as the opportunity to spend time together. Dad has been working hard (in his spare time) on our future plans for the college ministry we would like to start in September called Legacy Collegiate Studies. After much prayer, we are confident the Lord is leading us towards this new venture and are so excited about all He has in store. Dad (and our whole family) has always loved working with Christian young people and has such heart for leading young Christians to a deeper walk with the Lord. We would appreciate your prayers!

    I read the above passage in Job a few days ago and was encouraged so much by Job's initial response to his adversity: "Blessed be the name of the Lord". I am so looking forward to seeing God use us this year! He has been so good!

~Kari

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Tue, 25 Dec 2007 15:13:48 GMT

“Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people…” Luke 2:8-14

I am so thankful to God for sending Jesus to save us from the curse of sin—suffering, death, the frown of God at judgment, and hell. His salvation and the sure promise of His pardon, and His presence, and life forevermore is good news to me and the family. It has brought joy to us in the midst of our loss of precious Gail. I am so glad that there is another world of wholeness and harmony where those who have found room in their hearts for Jesus here are rejoicing there! Gail, along with the redeemed live there forever is the sunshine of the smile of God. “Love is stronger than death” Song of songs 8:6.

We are enjoying a quiet Christmas together at our home in Kansas where a recent snow storm has left us with a white Christmas. Pooling their training from Mom, the girls have whipped up a dinner that rivals anything from past years and have made this a fine Christmas day.

Joy and Kari start back RN’ing the first week in January. Micah, Kari’s Sweet Thing, is coming tomorrow for several days. Kate is going to start cleaning houses again—her motto on her ad being, “I Clean House.” Jonathan and I are completing the finish work on a house addition for friends up the creek. Jonathan is planning a month long missions trip to the Philippines with our friend, Dwight Palmquist, a veteran missionary. Scott and Will continue their schooling at home under Kate’s firm schoolmarm hand.

May the Lord Himself bless you with a Merry Christmas and a New Year full of good things that will last forever! We love you and thank you for being here for us!

~Woody

Sunday, December 09, 2007

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 23:20:26 GMT

Thank you all so very much for the outpouring of love and concern you showed during the memorials and through these recent days. God has really used you to be a help and an encouragement to us. Many of you came a great distance to be with us! May the Lord repay for your love and investment. I know that those of you who could not make it were with us in spirit and I count you as having been there also. How do I say thank you adequately enough? Thank you, dear friends.

Each one of the kids spoke at the memorials, either reading part of their letter they wrote to Mom earlier in the year, or telling about some way in which she benefited their life. It was a powerful part of the ceremony and I was so proud of them for being willing to bless their mom. I shared how Gail has been a help to me over the years and read from Proverbs 31, "Her children rise up and bless you; her husband also and he praises her saying, 'Many daughters have done nobly, but you [dear Gail] excel them all.'"

I told everyone what a killer shopper she was and how I wish that I had kept all the money she'd saved us. She even made us shop when we went camping. We would have to look at all the available campsites before choosing one. As we drove around the loop she made me put out a child at vacant sites in order to hold it in case it was the best. We often had several children distributed throughout the campground before we were done "shopping." You would have thought we were going to build a house there.

I so appreciate our pastor friend from the coast, Roger Evey who did a excellent job officiating. The funeral director spoke to everyone at the cemetery and said that he had not seen such a fine service in a long time. We had prayed that God would be glorified, Gail would be honored, and everyone would be blessed. I sense that He heard and answered.

Gail’s last words to us were, "Trust Jesus."

~Woody

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Thu, 06 Dec 2007 04:34:35 GMT

It’s nice to finally have some time to write now that things are settling down a bit.

Our trip to California was so good for us as a family. I think we all came back much more rested and refreshed. We visited places that are special to our family, we went surfing together, hiking together and talked about the many good memories we have of the past. It was so comforting for us to see God’s realness as He laid it on the hearts of our friends and family to provide us with meals, lodging, transportation and many other things during our trip.

The Memorial on Saturday went well and it was so good to spend time with old friends. The past two days have been a little harder as our friends have gone and the house is quiet again. Getting our Christmas tree on Monday and decorating the house for the holidays without Mom has been a hard. We are realizing that even though we have done a lot of grieving over the past several months, there are new things that come up which we hadn’t thought about before. This time a year ago, Mom and Dad were in Cozemel, Mexico celebrating their 30^th wedding anniversary. It was truly a gift from the Lord as it was only a few weeks after their return that Mom began having symptoms. Dad said how thankful he was for the sweet time they had down there.

We will have a lot of adjusting in the next several weeks. In some ways, it feels like a part of our lives is starting over and we are trying to find the new “normal”. God has been comforting us in so many ways and is helping us begin to look forward to what He has next for our family. We would love to continue keeping in touch with you all and are planning to keep up with the Xanga site. If any of you would still like a DVD, send us an email at the_shoemaker_update@yahoo.com. Thank you for keeping us in your prayers!

~Kari

Friday, November 30, 2007

Fri, 30 Nov 2007 03:28:10 GMT

We are thankful for a good and safe trip back from California. Here are a few pictures from the Memorial Service in Tulare. The past two weeks have been so restful and an excellent time to recover together. There is so much I could write about how God has been faithful to comfort us all along the way in the little ways He has provided for us during our trip. He is so near and real to each of us.
The Service went very well and each of us shared. We were overwhelmed at the Service with all the bouqets and floral arrangements we received from friends. They were all beautiful and truly honored Mom.

Today we have been busy unpacking and preparing for the service on Saturday. We pray that God would use the service to minister to and encourage those who attend. We are all looking forward to see those of you who can come!

~Kari

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Wed, 21 Nov 2007 00:31:05 GMT

Dear Friends,
    We are here in California enjoying some time as a family. It has been so good to rest and recooperate together.
    The service in Tulare was wonderful. God was good and used it to reach out to people. We'll have more about it later on.
    Here is our new mailing address in Kansas: 2357 W Road, Strong City, KS 66869
    Some details about the Memorial Service in Kansas: The service will be held at Flint Hills Community Church in Cottonwood Falls at 11:00am on Saturday, December 1st. If you are coming from out of town, the best place to stay would probably be in Emporia, which is about 25 minutes from the church. Also, if you could please RSVP if you are planning to attend, that will help us plan for the meal afterwards. Please send an email to theshoemakerupdate@yahoo.com with "RSVP" in the subject line. Thanks!
    We would like to reiterate that the DVD is a gift from our family to yours, so please don't feel obligated to send a donation for it.
    Thank you for your prayers as we are healing and processing. God is good and has been faithful to be our Comforter during this time.

~Kari

Monday, November 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 21:45:30 GMT

Thank you all for continuing to uphold us in prayer. The last two days have been difficult, but God has not ceased to pour out His grace on each of us. We are leaving first thing in the morning for California and plan to spend two weeks or so traveling and visiting friends.
When our Uncle (Gary) was here he helped us put together a special DVD of Mom's testimony that she gave back in March when she spoke to the Verity students a month after her diagnosis. He put over a hundred hours into editing and compiling pictures, songs and video clips onto the DVD and we were very pleased with how it turned out. It is about 24 minutes long and also has a few different slide shows of pictures from her life. We wanted to make it available for you, our dear friends, as a gift from our family. We trust that it would be a blessing to you and your family as you remember Gail. If you would like a copy, please send an email with your mailing address to: theshoemakerupdate@yahoo.com and "Gail's DVD" in the subject line. If you are planning to attend the memorial service in California, we could give you a copy when we see you there. You all have been such a blessing to us over these past several months and we want to give back to you in a small way. Your prayers, emails, cards, letters and comments have helped and encouraged us all along the way and we will never forget your faithfulness and friendship.

~Kari

Monday, November 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 14:03:02 GMT

Dear Friends,

Here are the directions to Bethel Assembly of God Church in Tulare, CA.

http://www.tularebethel.org/